[clutch in]

somehow feel like slacking today. well, life has been slack, i'm guilty of not using the time wisely to take over the world. (suddenly realising the profoundness of "pinky and the brain" and choosing which one of the mice i'd rather be)

i guess time has largely been spent on love, exercise and eating. i guess its wad i wanted after a draining medicine posting. found time to read 5 ppl i meet in heaven. always wanted to. and so yes, i've grown, hopefully in muscles, general body habitus, and importantly in the heart.

i guess its actually possible to have everything, somehow it all seems nearer that it's ever been. the world for the taking. everything this simple human being could want. and yes, u stand to lose everything in an instant.

okay gonna try to bring it to biting point, i'm holding up the rest of my ambitions, honking away behind.

[roy croft poem]

“I love you,
Not only for what you are,
But for what I am
When I am with you.

I love you,
Not only for what
You have made of yourself,
But for what
You are making of me.

I love you
For the part of me
That you bring out;
I love you
For putting your hand
Into my heaped-up heart
And passing over
All the foolish, weak things
That you can’t help
Dimly seeing there,
And for drawing out
Into the light
All the beautiful belongings
That no one else had looked
Quite far enough to find.

I love you because you
Are helping me to make
Of the lumber of my life
Not a tavern
But a temple;
Out of the works
Of my every day
Not a reproach
But a song.

I love you
Because you have done
More than any creed
Could have done
To make me good
And more than any fate
Could have done
To make me happy.

You have done it
Without a touch,
Without a word,
Without a sign.
You have done it
By being yourself.
Perhaps that is what
Being a friend means,
After all.”

(thought i'd post it here b4 i deleted the .txt file on my desktop, that's all)

[no problem]

mission for today: same mission as everyday. try to take over the world.

i'm attributing all this to you.

[things i've learnt]

-knowledge is free. something i wanna hold true in my medical career. well unless i'm gonna win a nobel prize or get to call smth after my name.

-people are special if u choose to make them special to you.

-you can be anything you want to be.

[love]

love =)

[one week left... in my life]

i keep telling myself that day is gonna come when i just snap and finish mugging everything in the world in one day.

something where if i din do it rite, you wouldn't have respect me at all. take me for whatever dirt.

i keep telling myself to live each day like its my last. the desperation makes u ignore the simple things that give joy.

strangely a beautiful face is just a beautiful face. either its all cos of you. or something's wrong.

wish i could grab everything i wanted. somehow i feel i have randomly got a large piece of that puzzle.

if so many can do so much with so little, why can't i just be spectacular given all that i have?

[finish the fight]

kinda regret now wasting so much time in m1 and m2.

especially things that din work thru... now all i have are the scars

all i can do is remind myself never to make the same mistake again, but i'll never know unless i try.

i'm throwing it all aside, i'm finishing this fight first.

i've forgotten how it feels to be special. gotta get back there.

[fragile]

life's so fragile.

one wrong word can ruin an evening's happiness.

one call can ruin a morning's happiness.

one slip can end your life on the road.

cancers and other illnesses pick people like lottery.

its a miracle just to be alive, well and happy. enjoy it while it lasts.

to all my friends who aren't these three things, just hang in there okay, goodness happens just as randomly as badness. just gotta open your heart to let the sunshine in.

[psahhhh i hate this stuff]

i feel like a stimpacked marine, who's running out of juice.

i need a new picture for the blog. any suggestions?

i've decided to go watch shoot em' up later. reviews will follow.

MARGH!

[inspired]

called my cofm patient's son today. finally decided to do it at 930pm despite it being a bad time to disturb anyone. anyhow he was such a nice guy, despite being out of his home.

told me how his father's staying at his mom's place. how his whole family's in india. how he's just set up a new food place. how he would have liked to have me meet his kids. also wants them to be doctors.

kinda reminded me that, whether i like it or not, i'm actually a dream come true, for those around me. and i partly owe it to these people to study hard and someday give back that hope they've put on me by helping them back.

also read AO's post on calberg and frens and overseas life. yeah who would have imagined life was like that! i could use a beer rite now. i think? i miss the pinacolada from alley bar!

medicine posting test. kickass!